Throwback Whoaback/thanks Marie Claire

As a non-mother I will most likely receive flack for posting what I'm about to post. But I've spent the past two years being a caregiver to my niece. I've seen the gritty; I've seen the sheer will it takes to raise a child. And I value independence, for myself and my sisters and my friends, too much to not comment.

I usually don't even read magazines anymore. But during a long browsing jaunt through the airport yesterday I picked up a copy of Marie Claire and was introduced to Elisabeth Badinter's controversial new book and methods on motherhood. Raved about in France, Badinter argues that modern women are allowing themselves to be pushed back: into the home, into the kitchen, into a child-obsessed culture that expects total enmeshment. I couldn't agree more. Reading this article made me realize hard and fast that many women I know in their twenties and thirties are seemingly excited about giving up careers for motherhood "once they have money saved and their husband's job is secure and rising."

Even I have uttered similar words. What has happened to us? As a sex we spent hundreds, even thousands if you wanna dig deep, of years being oppressed and living in a tyranny that dictated one thing: that we were babymakers. The twentieth century changed it all. Women just like us changed it all. Shattering glass ceilings, burning those bras, pushing for legislation, I could go on for days. And now the love of homemade baby food and organic cloth has sent us packing backwards? I'm confused. Almost as confused by this as I am by the new debate about birth control in America. I mean, what happened? Did a time machine take us back to 1942 and no one has realized it yet?

Badinter recommends simple solutions: go back to work after a maternity leave (I can attest that her continued career has saved my sister's sanity), make your partner do a lot of the work, and make sure your child is socialized and not ON you all the time. Be defined by your passions and a career too, not just motherhood. Make your own money!

Anyway, just thinking that these issues have to be written and talked about. Immediately. Or we are looking at some twisted regression of rights and feminism that should and could sicken us all.